Jun 25, 2003 4:19 PM
|Should age matter when you are attracted to someone? Where should you draw the line?|
|...at the "age of consent"||filtersweep|
Jun 26, 2003 4:20 AM
|Seriously, AGE itself isn't the issue, but maturity or "where someone IS in life" can be. There can also be an odd "power imbalance" in the relationship if age or finances are skewed too far- and worst of all... in college, my friend's father married a woman younger than she (or any of his daughters) was. That was not cool with them....|
|...at the "age of consent"||km-c|
Jun 26, 2003 4:36 AM
|thanks for the positive feedback...I felt a connection with this person.....I don't know why I got weirded out when I found out how young he was. Oh BTW...he's older then my oldest son....:)|
Jun 26, 2003 6:01 AM
|this is a really creepy sounding post. i hope you'd know whether or not when it was appropriate to have an intimate relationship with someone or not. if you don't, the law is pretty clear on the age of consent in most states. you cross that line and you can go to jail.|
|age of consent is not the issue.....||km-c|
Jun 26, 2003 6:37 AM
|....we are big boys and girls.... well over the 30 mark. Age gap approx. 9yrs. ...still sound creepy?|
|nah...go for it||ColnagoFE|
Jun 26, 2003 10:11 AM
|i was just hoping that you werent talking about some 11 year old or something.|
|nah...go for it||km-c|
Jun 26, 2003 11:02 AM
|your funny!....just taking a poll.... thanks for not being so analytical.|
|The fact that you have to ask may matter more than your age...||Silverback|
Jun 26, 2003 9:45 AM
|I wouldn't poke into this if you hadn't asked, but it occurs to me that people "well over the 30 mark" should be able to make these decisions on their own. If you have to ask, the answer may be No.
Also, you're vague (deliberately?) about exactly what's going on. I'm "attracted to" a dozen people a day, and some of them are younger than I am. In other circumstances, I might date them or have a "relationship" (I'm happily married and not looking for one, but if I were...). Nine years is a lot if you're 25 and 16, but not so important 40 years later.
For what it's worth, I don't think anybody can answer this for you. You seem to have doubts, though, and you don't seem to have the conviction to make up your own mind about an extremely personal decision--you're asking strangers to give you a shove in the direction you want to go, but think may not be right. Not to be cold about it, but what's wrong with enjoying the relationship now, for as long as it lasts, and see where it goes? But don't waste your time feeling guilty about it.
|It's about far more than a number.||jw25|
Jun 27, 2003 9:53 AM
|I'm always put off by age - seems people judge you by a number, rather than how you act. Maybe I'm biased, since people mistake me for a teenager still (I'm 27, but good genes, apparently...)
When I was 19, I met and started dating a woman 12 years older. At first, being a healthy 19 year old, I focused too much on the 12 years, but our personalities were fairly similar, at the time. Chronologically, she was 31, but mentally, not quite.
Anyhow, things went badly after several years, and I'm now engaged to someone 3 years older than I am. Still, it's not important to me how old someone is, but how they act.
And, as both of you are over 30, I think it becomes even less important.