|She almost made me cry||Starliner|
Mar 25, 2003 11:21 AM
|War business kind of got me down yesterday, so I dropped in to the local brew pub hoping to run into some friends for a cheer-up beer.
My one opening to the bar was this one empty stool aside this lonely looking, not too attractive lady. I hesitated, in a mood only to hang out with someone familiar to me and with no desire for empty words with strangers who wanted more from me than what I was willing to give out, which at that moment was next to nothing.
Yet my thirst took priority over my grumpiness, so I took the stool and ordered up a pint. As I waited, the lonely lady said something in my direction to which I felt obliged to respond. Oh, s$it, just leave me alone I thought. I looked at her and saw a woman who seemed out of place; having made a coarse attempt to look good that afternoon, she was wearing sparkly makeup which contrasted with her rather dumpy attire. She looked like she hadn't enjoyed the company of a man for some time and suddenly had the desire for one. Curiously, however, her vibe suggested there was something she wanted other than just a piece of meat.
She got to the point right away. "It's been a tough day for me. My son is over in Iraq right now and I'm scared..."
Boom. With those words, the wall I constructed between us plopped down in a cloud of dust. I realized then and there what was her motivation to reel in a man, and I chose to allow myself to give her what she wanted.
In a nutshell, she went to that bar looking for a man who could give a man's perspective on the whole war affair in the hope that she would find some comfort that her boy was going to be all right, and going to come home. My instincts were right, I thought, she doesn't have a man around she can talk to. So lucky me became the one to give her the word.
Here I was having spent much of the day tossing and turning over the war situation myself, and I had walked into that bar in a fog of anger, helplessness and disgust. And she wanted reassurance from me? Well then, why not.
She told me she was very concerned for his health, worried over the chemical danger which is present, and supporting her fears with gulf war syndrom stories. I looked at her son and saw that he's going to be all right, and I told her so, and she was comforted. I told her this time the forces were better prepared for the eventuality of chemical warfare, and that I saw him making it through OK. I saw him not becoming traumatized by events, but I saw him gaining a deeper more sober perspective on life from his experiences and told her to prepare herself for a different kind of guy when he returns.
She bought what I told her and in a celebratory fashion ordered another drink. At that moment, I felt my heart aching so badly I felt like crying. I then visualized my heart and saw that I had let her attach cords to it. Through those I had taken in much of her pain and fear so much that it lit up the crap I was feeling myself over the war. So I had to sweep out her energy away from my own in order to fix things.
Which is how things ended up. I righted myself, drained my beer and said goodbye to the soldier's mother, who was in a better mood than from when I first came into the bar.
And so was I.
|Wow...serious positive karmic energy. I mean that. nm||sn69|
Mar 25, 2003 11:32 AM
|Helping someone else is a great path toward...||PdxMark|
Mar 25, 2003 11:50 AM
|personal balance... Maybe I should go have a beer too... Thanks for lending her some support...|
|God bless you. And I mean that, too. nm||Jon Billheimer|
Mar 25, 2003 4:32 PM