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Dec 26, 2002 12:23 PM
I got my boyfriends' hand in marriage!!

After three years we decided to make it "official".

There, everybody knows it now, Edmund :P

All suggestions for cycling-related wedding bands welcome!
Dec 26, 2002 12:30 PM
Anne that is spectacular news. I think I speak for all of us when I say - I want to see his W-2.

All the best,

Alex and the gang
Great News......Len J
Dec 26, 2002 12:55 PM
May you be riding together when your both in your 80's.

Sniff, one less available lady cyclist. sniff.Sintesi
Dec 26, 2002 1:11 PM
Lucky guy. All the best, I second Len J. He does ride doesn't he?
Dec 26, 2002 1:12 PM
Glad you are happy.

Unclear, though -- are you married or engaged?

engaged!rollo tommassi
Dec 26, 2002 2:54 PM
We are "making it legal" and we're planning for a celebration in June.

Thanks for all the kind words from everyone!

I feel so...GIRLY!!! ;)
I think I can hear the gigglesDougSloan
Dec 26, 2002 3:14 PM
I am happy for you. Sounds like you two will have lots to share. That's wonderful.

Dec 26, 2002 1:23 PM
Rollo & Edmund. Hmmmm...has a sorta ring to it.
Dec 26, 2002 1:43 PM
Hey, congratulations. Anyone who is willing to brave the cold of Belgium for a cycling trip is a catch for any man. Add to that your intelligence, sense of humor, and integrity, and Edmund's about the luckiest guy around.
Good for you, opposite story here..Qubeley
Dec 26, 2002 4:01 PM
My girlfriend, who I was ready to marry, just told me we are not "suitable" for each other. Major mental breakdown. My whole plan for life is a big question mark now..
Couragerollo tommassi
Dec 26, 2002 7:43 PM
my dear friend...

Your life 'plan' should always have a ?, as it is the only way to learn.

Be positive...your bike still loves you!

I wish you a happy 2003!
happened to me about 20 times!DougSloan
Dec 26, 2002 7:54 PM
I can't even recall the number of times I was in your position. It seems horrible at the time, but years later you'll realize you are probably happy with the path life took you. When you get where you want to be, don't be unhappy with the way you got there.

Well old boy, that stinks!eyebob
Dec 27, 2002 5:27 AM
I would offer lots of pithy advice (that when really lived is factually and viscerally correct) but I will not. If you can get out and ride. Excercise is food for the soul. I would simply leave you with this thought.

Learn to love and live the questions of life. Eventually you'll live your way to their answers.

That sucks.......Len J
Dec 27, 2002 6:10 AM
but it's better to know it now than in several years after several kids.

As Rollo said, Have courage!......Not just to get through the day, but to look at the reality of what happened, to learn & to grow.

If my experience is any guide, the new "plan" for your life will be better than the one you lost.

Hoping 2003 is your year.

a pithy quote...DougSloan
Dec 27, 2002 6:51 AM
"Every time a door closes, another opens. However, don't spend too long staring at the one that closed, or you may not see the new one opened." (can't recall source)

Christmas memoriesms
Dec 27, 2002 1:22 PM
Nineteen years ago, my then-fiancee broke off our engagement with a similar comment a few days before Christmas. For the most part, my family and friends reacted in one of the two following ways: (1) They avoided me as if I had a contagious disease; or, (2) They told me how much they disliked my fiancee and how lucky I was to be free of her. Neither reaction made me feel any better. My words of advice and comfort are: I have been where you are. It sucks. But, with time things get better. The amount of time varies from person to person. In my case, it took about nine months before I was out of a funk and about two years before I was back in a serious relationship.
Thanks a lot, everyone...I really really appreciate it!Qubeley
Dec 27, 2002 2:04 PM
I really appreciate your guy's advices, support and sharing of experience. This community is the best!
I do know time will wash away the sadness. But at present time, everyday feels like eternity. We had so much together, almost everything I see or touch just reminds me more of her, I can find no escape. I just couldn't be rational and cool about it. I really thought she is the "one" for me, the "perfect match". If I can think of anything bad about her, it will make me feel tremedously better, but I just can't.
I guess this is my love, mine only. I just have to suffer through it by myself.
Congrat to rollo tommassi, I really envy you, I do. I hope my leak here didn't ruin your party. Cheers!
You don't have to be down on her to feel better!czardonic
Dec 27, 2002 4:16 PM
Back in 2000, my girlfriend of 2 1/2 years decided that I just wasn't the one for her. It seemed completely out of the blue to me. Up to that point, I'd thought that we would get married, etc. I still loved her, and couldn't picture my life without her.

If you are into books, I really suggest that you check out "Coming Apart" (ISBN: 1-57324-177-6) [Full Disclosure: My employer is involved in the distribution of this book. By all means, buy it used from an independent bookstore, or check it out at the Library]. It really helped me get past the "she was my one true love" notion, and feel better about our break-up in general without blaming her for the pain I was in.

I'm not sure if I read this in the same book, but it stuck in my mind: This is a painful decision for both parties. The "ender" also had to come to terms with the loss of life plans, and on top of that steel themselves to break things off and deal with the hurt/anger they've caused. Under the circumstances, we couldn't really commiserate, but I felt less betrayed knowing that this isn't a decision made lightly.

Good luck.
One more quick thing to addeyebob
Dec 28, 2002 6:39 PM
If you need to lean on who's gone through it fairly recently shoot me some e-mails at

Damn, it seems to be the season :( (nm)Stampertje
Jan 7, 2003 8:53 AM