's Forum Archives - Non-Cycling Discussions

Archive Home >> Non-Cycling Discussions(1 2 3 4 )

Dying to ask this question(48 posts)

Dying to ask this questionjtkirk15
Nov 1, 2002 6:43 AM
I am a guy and no I don't go looking for this, but sometimes it's too obvious not to notice. I am referring to the bathroom. When some males use the wall urinal, have you ever noticed how a great many of them take the time to undo the belt, the pants, the zipper, push everything down and then finally get to work. I am curious why some adult males act like 5 year olds. Why don't they use the zipper and the slit in the underwear to fish it out and then go to town? I don't know how many times I've walked into a bathroom only to see a guy practically getting dressed again after taking a simple leak. I can't think of any other reason then that those individuals wear panties which don't have the handy escape slit. Come on now, you know who you are out there. Just tell me why. Isn't that a lot of extra work?
Nov 1, 2002 7:09 AM
I suppose some manhood just need more room for retrieval (speaking from experience, of course!) :-))
Dying to answer this question...TJeanloz
Nov 1, 2002 7:11 AM
The slit isn't big enough. Seriously, unless everything is lined up just right, I have a hard time getting everything out of the underwear built in fly, and then the way it's folded over cramps my style.
Dying to answer this question...jtkirk15
Nov 1, 2002 7:19 AM
Getting everything out? What all do you need?

Man I wish I had a penis the size of Rhode Island.
Dying to answer this question...TJeanloz
Nov 1, 2002 7:22 AM
I need the front end out with enough distance to make sure none gets on my pants.
Getting it out is not the problemColnagoFE
Nov 1, 2002 7:21 AM
Now I've seen everything posted here.

Getting it back in is without soaking yourself in the process is. You gotta be able to relax and let it all out so to speak and taking the wedding tackle out through the slit--epecially in tighter pants like blue jeans is not always the best method.

Maybe now you can explain to me why my dad tucks his dress shirts into his underwear? ;)
Getting it out is not the problemjtkirk15
Nov 1, 2002 7:28 AM
Can't explain that but I have another question. Through my research (not really, but...) I've noticed the vast majority of the people who do this are older, say about 40. I'm early 20's. Is it that you all have lost motor control of your body. Mine isn't the size of a wheel spoke but I've never scraped nor dripped on myself. And who wears tight jeans nowadays other than Tim McGraw and a few other country music singers?
since you askedColnagoFE
Nov 1, 2002 8:28 AM
yes....i believe it is a prostate thing. the older you get the harder it is to control those last few drops. i'm 37 and it's not as easy as when i was 20. the saying goes that it isn't IF you will have prostate problems but WHEN.

So tight jeans are out? I still like my Levis 501 button flys and they are fairly tight. Guess I'm a walking nerd with those on huh? Do I need some baggy jeans with painters flaps on them? I remember wearing those in the 70s...we thought we were tres cool then. Never thought those would come back into style. I'm predicting parachute pants will be back next if they already aren't.
Dude, nice pant rant! Parachute pants - LOL! (nm)RhodyRider
Nov 1, 2002 9:58 AM
In your early 20's? No Sh!t. I never would have guessed.Dave Hickey
Nov 1, 2002 10:09 AM
Hey "dude", go swing your manhood at a
In your early 20's? No Sh!t. I never would have guessed.jtkirk15
Nov 1, 2002 6:06 PM
Um ok, don't know what brought about the "dude" comment but whatever floats your boat. I guess us young whipper snappers should just learn how it's done and pull our pants down every time we pee. That's the mature way, sir.
Nov 1, 2002 7:18 AM
Its easier to unzip/unbutton/unbelt and pull it down a little and go (plus you never touch it), than to reach in there and grab your monster and pull it though, plus a zipper against your salami isn't a pleasent feeling.

Doesn't matter to me unless they drop their pants all the way to ground...

This is the perfect link for you.. play this game..
Nov 1, 2002 7:32 AM
Its easier to unzip/unbutton/unbelt and pull it down a little and go (plus you never touch it), than to reach in there and grab your monster and pull it though, plus a zipper against your salami isn't a pleasent feeling.

Doesn't matter to me unless they drop their pants all the way to ground...

This is the perfect link for you.. play this game..
Nov 1, 2002 7:35 AM
Fun game, I missed one.

And heaven forbid you touch "it". What on earth would you do if "it" came in contact with you?
about the flash game...Qubeley
Nov 1, 2002 5:49 PM
Did you try to click on the urinal with a man using it?
Nov 1, 2002 7:39 AM
... on the underwear, that is. Some allow fairly free access; some are too tight and overlap too much. A nice pair of boxers with a big opening, and everything practically falls out by itself.

Maybe some guys undo everything to give them more "warmup" time, getting everything ready to get going.

What I'd really like to know is how racers pee on the bike. I can pull over and yank up one leg of the shorts and go, but if I tried that on the bike I'm fairly certain I'd have it all down my leg and all over the bike. What's the secret here? (Sorry to yank this back to a cycling discussion.)
Nov 1, 2002 7:46 AM
Warmup time? I hope I never get old and need warm up time to piss.

As for yanking it back to a cycling discussion, this is a NON-CYCLING DISCUSSION FORUM. Please take your talk of bikes elsewhere (I'm kidding). This forum is strictly for pee-related topics!!
Well, you know you either get old....or the alternative.rwbadley
Nov 1, 2002 8:53 AM
Remember how the song goes? "hope I die, before I get old" (talkin' 'bout my generation)

The other way to go "die young, stay pretty" (Blondie)
"live fast, die young and leave a good looking corpse"ColnagoFE
Nov 1, 2002 9:07 AM
who was it that said that? i think it was james dean.
"Too fast to live, too young to die, bye-bye"Dave Hickey
Nov 1, 2002 9:22 AM
The Eagles singing about James Dean
Have you SEEN Blondie lately ? (nm)Scot_Gore
Nov 2, 2002 12:40 PM
Speaking of warm-up time....rwbadley
Nov 1, 2002 12:27 PM
There is a tendancy that as we age the prostate grows a bit. This can cause pressure that will decrease flow, and lead to a certain amount of needed warm up time, before 'the flow' occurs
So you're the guy who I caught staring at me the other day...Starliner
Nov 1, 2002 8:54 AM
He must have been curious as to why I was using the kiddie urinal -
I wear shorts and boxers.........Dave Hickey
Nov 1, 2002 8:54 AM
My favorite method is just hike up the shorts and use the leg hole. Fast and efficient................
re: Dying to ask this questionShad
Nov 1, 2002 9:23 AM
For all the reasons above, especially the one about avoiding the sharp teeth on the zipper, plus it just feels good to open it all up, air it out and cool it down.
re: Dying to ask this questionjtkirk15
Nov 1, 2002 9:51 AM
Disturbing, but funny.

As for the guy who uses his shorts leg opening. I guess the older you get the less you can control the leaking and the less you care about how you look.

Levis 501?? Man those things are tight. I don't think you're a nerd though, you just wear tight pants. I think it's interesting that those who open all the way up also wear tight pants. I wear baggy pants so I don't need to open up, I'm already aired out!!
back in the dayColnagoFE
Nov 1, 2002 10:25 AM
I remember when the only jeans to own were the 501s that you had to wash and shrink to fit. You bought em an inch or so big in the waist and about 4" long and they shrunk after washing. You had to wear and wash 'em quite a few times so they got good and faded out and fit like a second skin. For a while holes in the knees were popular as well. Baggy jeans or "relaxed fit" on the other hand were worn by old men with pot bellies--usually they had an elastic waist. Even gym shorts were tight. There was even a short period in the late 70s where tight got taken to an extreme--especially by girls. Some had to use a pliers to pull up their zippers and the running joke used to be that they had to grease their hips and jump off a bulding to get into 'em. Just for the record what is the hip thing for 20 somethings to wear today? Don't tell me it's those big baggy skateboard/hip hop jeans with big bell bottoms and 15 pockets...usually worn about half the way down your butt so your underwear shows.
back in the dayDave Hickey
Nov 1, 2002 10:31 AM
Don't worry ColangoFE, I'm wearing Levi 501's also. I'm 45 and wear 31 waist Levi's. It's like making love to a woman(no jtkirk15, Miss November doesn't count), somethings just get better with age.
Yeah, and I'm dying to ask THIS question...Spinchick
Nov 1, 2002 11:43 AM
Why do women take so d@mn long in the restroom? What's the big deal? Ya pull down your pants, take a leak, pull 'em back up, wash yer hands. Seriously, I have used the men's room many times because the line was SO much shorter and the guys get in there and out in a minute. I'd rather squat behind a bush then wait in a line for 20 minutes with my eyes turning yellow.

I've wanted to ask that for a really long time...
I'd always assumed. . .czardonic
Nov 1, 2002 12:38 PM
. . .that women's restrooms were a good deal more hospitable than the mens. Rarely do I come across a mens room that I don't want to leave as soon as humanly possible.
By hospitable, do you meanSpinchick
Nov 1, 2002 1:01 PM
friendly, chit-chat hospitable or not nearly as smelly hospitable? Either way, if you were only in there for two minutes, what difference does it make? I can hold my breath long enough to take a whiz.
I get the impression that there is a lot of chitchatColnagoFE
Nov 1, 2002 1:28 PM
You ever notice how women always go in pairs? They must sit in there and chat about things. And then you have the makeup0 routine that takes time...lots of mirror looking. Plus it takes up more room to put all stalls in. You can fit 2-3 urinals in the space of 1 stall so there are probably less spots overall than in men's bathrooms.
My pet peeveKristin
Nov 1, 2002 1:41 PM
My number one (or is that my #2) pet peeve is Chatty Kathy's in the jon. Its rude and just plain distracting to the other customers. I really don't care about some lady's uncle's ulcer, nor do I want to hear about it while I'm trying to take a wizz.
you think that's badtrekkie1
Nov 1, 2002 3:15 PM
There's a guy who's about 6'10" where I work. You can be taking a dump, and he'll peer over the stall and start talking to you. I ignore him, but just want to yell "GET THE F... OUT OF HERE, YOU MORON!"
Au contraire.Sintesi
Nov 4, 2002 5:58 AM
I once worked in a truckstop in the evenings after highschool and had to clean the bathrooms there as part of my many menial duties. Men can be indiscriminate with their aim, fail to raise the seat, forget to flush, leave cigarettes on the floor, etc.... They're pigs granted. But the ladies can and do far far worse. For sitters they managed to wet the seatie quite a bit, some couldn't even get their poop in the bowl. One lady even got poop on the wall behind the toilet. I walked in one eveing and some swell gal had stopped up the sink with paper towels and filled it with piss. I guess she was letting us know the service sucked. Tampons, you ask? We will not discuss the tampons.

What that did to my poor young impressionable mind . . .
but then again, you are talking about "lady" truckers nmtrekkie1
Nov 4, 2002 6:43 AM
Definitely an oxymoron. nmSintesi
Nov 4, 2002 7:12 AM
Depends. Are you a squatter or a sitter?Kristin
Nov 1, 2002 1:34 PM
If you're a squatter, you've got it made in the shade...get in, get out, get on with it. You never have to touch a thing. But if you're a sitter then you must follow the ritual:

*Begin by examining all open stalls and select the cleanliest.
*Place coat or sweater over any large openings in the stall door so that no snoops can peep in.
*Remove three sheets of toilet paper from the end of the roll and disgard.
*If the stall was last used by a squatter, remove ten sheets of paper and wipe entire seat clean. (For messy squatters, 20 sheets may be necessary.)
*If no seat liners are available, line seat with four sheets on each side.
*Do business.
*Carefully push the paper on the seat into bowl.
*Flush (use foot if desired).
*Reassemble clothing and exit stall.
*Wash hands thoroughly before putting coat on.

I don't know what's sadder, really, that this thread exists or that I'm participating in it.
Ick. Definetely a squatter.Spinchick
Nov 2, 2002 11:13 AM
I've been known to go behind a bush in the middle of winter just to avoid those disgusting port-o-johns.
you tell us!tarwheel
Nov 6, 2002 7:16 AM
I always thought women took so long because the ladies room had all sort of amenities not wasted on the men. You know, stuff like couches, TVs, cappucino makers, etc.

My question is: Why do so many guys not bother to flush the toilet or urinal? How much effort would it take? Talk about lazy slobs. I grew up with 3 brothers and 4 sisters and I will have to state unequivocably that guys in general are bigger slobs than women, myself included and admitting that exceptions abound.
I've found the oppositeColnagoFE
Nov 7, 2002 1:09 PM
Seems that women never flush. Always leaving the toilet paper floating around. Gross.
you guys must be realllllly bored at work. nmMXL02
Nov 1, 2002 1:54 PM
you could say that (nm)ColnagoFE
Nov 1, 2002 2:08 PM
Faster to undress than to haul the whole thing out... (nm)cory
Nov 1, 2002 4:43 PM
Haul the whole thing out? Great nmrwbadley
Nov 1, 2002 9:20 PM
AlsoEager Beagle
Nov 4, 2002 7:41 AM
Why on earth do some people have to lean on the wall behind the urinal (even when sober) - some people even lean with their whole forearm flat on the wall - do they really have no idea what lives on those walls?

Anyone see that interesting research with the peanuts on the bar as free snacks? Found about 30 different urine traces in the nuts after about an hour....
I coulda lived without knowing that trivia (nm)ColnagoFE
Nov 5, 2002 7:57 AM
Then there's the guy in the stall with his brief case sprawled128
Nov 5, 2002 8:29 AM
out between his bony, belt encircled ankles. Papers spread on the floor, you know working...Dude, it's break time you know, leave your work at the office huh?? and then gathers it all up off the floor again into the folder. Some people get pret-ty intimate with the surroundings in there. Same people I suppose who leave the newspaper spread out all over the floor, a courtesy for the next guy I'm sure. I'm always scootin' it around with my feet trying not to get too interested in any article ....

what I miss, is just how some guys manage to make such an amazingly huge, wet area around the urinal! hell, man, you're already given a whole wall to piss on and you miss? Go for the puck! Hit the puck! I'll bet these are the same guys who have to pull their pants down, maybe they don't have enough size to get past the fabric or take good aim??

Ich bin heis...