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If bears could ride, what would they ride?(20 posts)

If bears could ride, what would they ride?mr_spin
Oct 29, 2001 1:57 PM
And where?

For this discussion, you can include Koala bears and Panda bears, even though they aren't really bears like Grizzly bears, Kodiak bears, Polar bears, etc.

"B.J. and the Bear" doesn't count.
Intense downhill mountain bikes nmDog
Oct 29, 2001 2:58 PM
Koala Bears would ride...Kristin
Oct 29, 2001 3:09 PM
...motor scooters with a max speed of 5 MPH. They would wear hydration packs filled with Eucyliptus juice for that ongoing buzz.

If a Koala was feeling athletic on a given day, it may choose to pedal a 5" Trek 720 Hybrid with a shock abstorbing seat post and front suspension. No need for a seat pack, as they store tools, spare tubes, cell phone and Insurance card in their built in Jersey pocket. Also, no need for pull alongs. Kids fit right into the pocket along with tools. Just wrap 'em in an old sock to avoid puncture wounds!
Excellent pointmr_spin
Oct 29, 2001 3:55 PM
Forgot about the pouch thing. That's got to come in handy for the Koala on the run. I would think it would be more aero to have it on the back, however.

Thinking about the nutrition requirements of other bears, I came up with a few new flavors of Power Bars:

  • Bamboo - for Pandas
  • Eucalyptus - for Koalas
  • Salmon - for Kodiak, Brown, and Grizzly bears
  • Salmon/Chocolate Chip - because Kodiak, Brown, and Grizzly bears need variety
  • Seal - for Polar bears
  • Seal/Chocolate Chip - for Polar bear variety

Bear PowerbarsDog
Oct 29, 2001 5:03 PM
And don't forget, another flavor of bear Powerbars:

*Doritos/hot dog/Pringles flavored - for brown bears who live in Yosemite National Park (they break into cars and steal people food all the time)

Bear PowerbarsCanada
Oct 29, 2001 11:21 PM
Blueberry for the black bears.
If a bear ate a powerbar....4bykn
Oct 30, 2001 7:30 AM
Would that make him/her a powerbear??? :o)
Bear Alert!Kristin
Oct 30, 2001 7:18 AM
The Colorado State Department of Fish and Wildlife is advising hikers, hunters, fishermen, and golfers to take extra precautions and be on the alert for bears...

They advise people to wear noise-producing devices such as little bells on their clothing to alert but not startle the bears unexpectedly. They also advise you to carry pepper spray in case of an encounter with a bear. It is also a good idea to watch for signs of bear activity. People should especially avoid areas that show signs of grizzly bear activity.

Some signs include bear droppings:
(People should be able to recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear droppings.)

Black bear droppings are smaller and contain berries and possibly squirrel fur.

Grizzly bear droppings have little bells in them and smell like pepper spray.
Hee hee hee....nm4bykn
Oct 30, 2001 7:28 AM
Bear Alert!snapdragen
Nov 4, 2001 8:37 AM
Once again, late to the party. In Canada the bear bells are called dinner bells.
A bike with a wide seatmatt
Oct 29, 2001 7:36 PM
They have very wide butts. I would think it would have to be a mountain bike too since the 2.1 tires would support their weight better. It would have to be a hard tail mountain bike though because bears wouldn't go for that sissy rear suspension stuff. Bears are too tough for that.
that reminds memr_spin
Oct 30, 2001 7:55 AM
There was a post a few months back about a guy having trouble adjusting his brakes or something with his bear (sic) hands.

I was on the floor laughing when someone wrote back: That's your problem! Bears don't have hands, they have paws!

That was a good one.

Do clipless pedals work with paws?

Since bears have notoriously bad eyesight, I wonder what kind of eyewear they would use.
Ambervision of course! (nm)Kristin
Oct 30, 2001 8:20 AM
does a bear ride in the woods? (nm)Rusty McNasty
Oct 30, 2001 5:42 AM
What kind of beer does a 400lb Grizzly drink?DINOSAUR
Oct 30, 2001 8:19 AM
Anything he wants....
Oct 30, 2001 8:46 AM
Remember the Hamm's Bear? "From the land of sky-blue wa-ater (wa-ater) . . . ." Is that beer still around?
The bear is in rehab, don't know about the beer.bikedodger
Oct 30, 2001 8:48 AM
Answer= Pabst Bear Ribbon NMDINOSAUR
Oct 30, 2001 9:35 PM
...the horror...(nm)Js Haiku Shop
Oct 31, 2001 11:10 AM
Moosehead nmDog
Oct 31, 2001 1:44 PM