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This was just TOO much - Ebay item(29 posts)

This was just TOO much - Ebay itemmoneyman
Sep 23, 2003 9:46 AM
I searched for "Assos" and got to this item:

The description says "They haven't been worn much and the Chamois is in good condition but it has some smearing."

Some smearing? It looks like the guy got caught without his Immodium AD and he calls it "Some smearing!"

I thought about bidding and having the pad replaced, but I just couldn't bring myself up to it.

Yeesh. Yuchh.

Oughta be a smear 'em, you own 'em for life. nmMg1
Sep 23, 2003 9:50 AM
Sep 23, 2003 9:53 AM
That's just wrong.

1. Who would be crazy enough to buy used bike shorts?

2. I have never left a ummmm...stain on my chamois. That dude needs to figure out how to use toilet paper.

3. I've never had my chamois ride up to the point where a stain could happen!

Look at it this way, the shorts now have cool racing stripes!
Ugh...ONCE in a life time
Sep 23, 2003 9:59 AM
Good one ! :)

I personally wear underwear with my lycra, you can get these super thin comfy spandex underwear.
Hey, thats my auction!!!!!Spiderman
Sep 23, 2003 10:02 AM
nah, just kidding.
That is why I draw the line at Jerseys on ebaybimini
Sep 23, 2003 10:04 AM
I've gotten some really neat one of a kind jerseys on ebay but never could bring myself to bidding on a used shorts.

Now I know why. And just think about what you can't see!
Just plain foulPaulCL
Sep 23, 2003 10:10 AM
ooh gross. Jeez...who would bid on that? Before putting it up for auction you would think he'd clean them first.
could be thong guys saddle with that stripe nmandy02
Sep 23, 2003 10:10 AM
Bet this pic winds up on a fetish site. (nm)PseuZQ
Sep 23, 2003 10:36 AM
Get over it people!Spoiler
Sep 23, 2003 10:46 AM
A gentle hand-washing with antibacterial soap and they're good as new.
So the poor guy gets out of the saddle to fart and in the excitement he "drew-mud." Big deal. I do it almost weekly.
It's not like you're going to be washing your face with them or eating food directly off the pad. And nobody besides Cyclingforhealth is going to mistakenly wear them on their face.
You're all just victims of a capitalist propoganda designed to sell more products at higher prices.

And you can belee dat, Playa.
One mans smear could be another mans gear! nmgtscottie
Sep 23, 2003 10:51 AM
when you're slidin into third...(nm)ColnagoFE
Sep 23, 2003 11:07 AM
One verse doesn't cut it: The whole "song"...PsyDoc
Sep 23, 2003 11:52 AM
When you're sliding into first and you feel a something burst...diarrhea, diarrhea.

When you're sliding into second and you feel something beckon...diarrhea, diarrhea.

When you're sliding into third and you and you feel a juicy turd...diarrhea, diarrhea.

When you're sliding into home and you feel a burst of foam...diarrhea, diarrhea.

Back to the photo...perhaps this "stain" is not turd related. Some anti-friction remedies (e.g., bag balm or udder butter) can stain the chamois...just an alternative thought.
You frighten me.Fatnslow
Sep 23, 2003 11:07 AM
You mean to tell me you s&%t your britches once a week? Have you thought about seeing a doctor? I have what could probably be considered the most overactive intestinal tract in nature and I have never s&%t my britches on a ride.

Besides, I don't care how much antibacterial soap has been used on it.a s&%tstain is a S&%tstain and I sure as hell am not going to put my nice clean a$$ on someone else's waste residue.

I've evolved.Spoiler
Sep 23, 2003 4:32 PM
Any significant amounts of waste residue have long been eliminated. All you're reacting to is the lasting pigment change. Just die the whole damn chamois brown if the color is so important.

My own excrement no longer frightens me. I defecate and/or flatulate no more often than anyone else. I have evolved to the state where if a combination of the two leave an impression on my clothes, it no longer bothers me. In fact, I embrace it as part of the beautiful cycle of life.

Society has become so uptight, we've been provided with colored underwear as a weak attempt to cover up these little intestinal anomolies. I alway wear snow white underwear to accentuate the skid marks, set them off, and provide aesthetic contrast. In fact, I'm thinking about getting a skidmark tatooed up my tail bone. All I have to do is find an artist with a very subtile touch.
Spoiler!the bull
Sep 23, 2003 6:01 PM
Trust me if you got a microscope there would be some brown chunks worked into the threads.
I see where your coming from, it is not gonna hurt you, but just knowing its there is not the peace-of-mind I want to have while a bunch of guys wearing spandex are chasing me down!
Ever hear of a$$-pennies?Spoiler
Sep 23, 2003 8:09 PM
Here's a self-confidence boosting trick I learned off of Comedy Central.
Save you pennies. When you have about $5 in pennies, shove them up your butt. One-by-one, ten at a time, hell, go for the whole load at once. After you retrieve them, release the pennies back into circulation any way you please. Give them to friends, pass them as change at supermarkets, hell, drop them in your church's collection plate.
Those pennies will be passed further on. They will be distributed throughout all society.

Now what you have done is spread your a$$ pennies all around your community. When you look at that cashier again, you'll know she has handled something that came out of your a$$. When you look at your boss, you know he's got your a$$ pennies in his pocket. That kind of knowlege puts you way ahead in the confidence game.
Sep 23, 2003 8:46 PM
I heard in some parts of California they use small rodents for that.

Don't they look at ya kinda strange when you hand over your change while wearing rubber gloves on your hands? Shades of Howard Hughes...

I always kinda wonder what our local check out girl has been handling... she has the look she might be carrying more than her share of @ss pennies

Do you really have to shove them up there? Maybe rather just dump on 'em. Or mebbe put 'em down the outhouse or septic for a week or two. That'll give ya the snickers... Honey, get that dirty money out of yer mouth (as the two year old shoves another penny twixt tooth and gum) yuck heheheh
Sep 23, 2003 9:06 PM
Nice picSpanked
Sep 24, 2003 7:26 AM
I like posting pics and making fun of gay people too.
Sep 24, 2003 6:18 PM
Spoiler is gay? Spoiler, why your new name, Spanked? Is it a reference to your personal life, or what happens to you daily during your road bike rides? I wish you well. I am a newcomer here, so I am confused.
You must have a baby in the house. -nmJFR
Sep 23, 2003 11:17 AM
Yes! Get over it people!Spoiled
Sep 23, 2003 11:38 AM
Just wash them! They will be fine.
I have a 10 month old, and I dont wear his smeared diapers nmthegarzacomplex
Sep 23, 2003 11:49 AM
how funnyJFR
Sep 23, 2003 11:52 AM
the two replies that suggest "getting over it" both come from people with "spoil" in their handle :)
I think the last one should have been 'soiled'rwbadley
Sep 23, 2003 12:10 PM
This smells like a joke/betgeeker
Sep 23, 2003 12:08 PM
as in "I betcha $100 I can find some eBay geek to buy my s**t-stained bibs".
"smells"... :-)...nmJFR
Sep 23, 2003 12:19 PM
I've found this winter's helmet liner!...nmbicyclerepairman
Sep 23, 2003 12:58 PM