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How do you keep the wife from worrying?(20 posts)

How do you keep the wife from worrying?Mr Nick
Sep 5, 2003 8:45 AM
I like to tell my wife about interesting stories that have been posted on RBR. Unfortunately I told her about the post a couple of days ago were two people died. This news, along with a recent car/bike crash of my cousins has made my wife very nervous. She is trying to be supportive of my riding, but I can tell it really freaks her out. Especially because our area is a very high traffic area. Anybody have some good statistics, or good advice that I can use to relieve my wife's anxiety?
come home safe?mohair_chair
Sep 5, 2003 8:48 AM
The only way to stop her from worrying is to stop cycling, and there's no way I would give that up. There are statistics around that say that cycling is less dangerous than many other sports, such as swimming, and not that much more dangerous than life itself. I think they come from that book 'Effective Cycling.'

Stop telling her bad stories.
easy; dont tell her interesting stories posted on RBR.Steve_0
Sep 5, 2003 8:51 AM
You want stats? 30k+ people per year die in a car; luckily, you're not in a car.
difference w/ cars is you can buy more armor/safetykenyee
Sep 5, 2003 9:49 AM
Get a Volvo/MB or other car w/ 5 star crash ratings. Keeps you from getting killed by the goobers who rip around curves too fast, slam on their brakes, and then spin into you or the drunk driver or the guy who fell asleep and went across the median...drivers seem to keep getting worse...
don't tell her RBR stories about cycling fatalities?terry b
Sep 5, 2003 8:55 AM
and call if you're running behind.

data - check this one out - 800 deaths due to cycling nationwide (year 2001.) 42000 due to cars, 14,500 due to poisoning - we have a pretty (statistically) safe hobby.
Now theres a fun statistic. You are 18 times more likely to be poisoned than to be killed while riding. nmKristin
Sep 5, 2003 9:57 AM
Cycling stats do not point to safety vs. drivingMg1
Sep 5, 2003 10:13 AM
Interesting stats, but the relevant comparison is deaths per passenger (cyclist) mile. You are much more likely to be injured out there on your bike than you are in a car. Cycling deaths only occur at 800/42,000 = 2% of the rate of auto deaths; but the denominator, miles traveled, must be what, .0000000000002%? Definitely not safer on the bike.

Another way to think of it, consider the pool of bikers from which the 800 deaths came from versus the pool of drivers. Not sure what the ratio would be, but again it shows the relative dangers of cycling vs. driving.
Cycling stats do not point to safety vs. drivingTri_Rich
Sep 5, 2003 10:27 AM
Deaths per mile is not a relevent comparison due to the speed differential between cycling and driving. More appropriate might be deaths/hour.
Agree; hours is an even better basis for comparison nmMg1
Sep 5, 2003 10:39 AM
That's just the thing about comparitive stats isn't it?terry b
Sep 5, 2003 11:31 AM
Since there is no quantitative data pool of hours ridden or miles ridden, we can never draw a reasonable comparison. However, for the sake of argument let's say that 1,000,000 bikes were ridden for 10 hours each last year, (I'm guessing a low number) and we saw 800 deaths in 10e7 hours. I'm personally feeling pretty safe since I average about 500 hours per year.

The point was not to whip the numbers, the point was to give the poster some numbers to run by his worrying wife. I think a reasonable person could gain some comfort from the fact that 800 lives were lost in a nation of 292,000,000 people.

And of course, when you start sharing horror stories from a small statistical sample (like RoadBikeReview) it's going to feel a whole lot worse.
without cycling you are already deadDougSloan
Sep 5, 2003 1:31 PM
The odds are remote of being eaten by a shark. However, what are the odds if you never get in the ocean? Point is, since you don't have to bike (like you don't have to swim in the ocean), and you are very vulnerable, is it risky, compared to the need. You almost must travel by car, occasionally or even daily. So, comparisons don't really match.

Just tell you that you are as careful as you can be, and without it you are already dead.

don't tell her RBR stories about cycling fatalities?lemmy999
Sep 5, 2003 12:51 PM
yeah but poisining deaths apply to everyone in the USA. so do car deaths. but bicycle deaths only apply to those that ride bicycles. 14,500/300,000,000 = .0048%. But if there are only 10,000,000 people that bicycle (I have no idea how many people ride bicycles) then the bike % is
800/10,000,000 = .008% It is really hard to compare stuff like this. I read on some website that for every mile traveled your are 20 times more likely to be killed on a motorcycle than you are in a car. I have always thought riding a bicycle on the road is at least as dangerous as riding motorcycles.
have you spent much time riding motorcycles?terry b
Sep 5, 2003 1:26 PM
At one time I had a Honda CB1100F that I used for commuting when I lived in Boulder. All empty country roads between my house and StorageTek. I often rode them between 90 and 120 miles an hour. I have a really hard time hitting 90 on my Colnago. Whereas my game used to be roaring up between cars and blowing by invisibly, I can rarely get away with that on any of my bicycles. My guess is that your probability of getting hit by a car varies with how much time the car has to react to your presence. Travelling at 20mph, you have a big advantage over travelling at 50.
Sep 6, 2003 6:52 AM
I have been riding motorcycles for 25 years (I am 33) and street motorcycles since I was 15 and have over 80,000 miles on street motorcycles. Not nearly as much as some of the iron butts, but still not bad. I agree with the "time to react" comment, but cars are more likely to see you on a motorcycle and you are going with the flow of traffic on a motorcycle. You don't have cars overtaking you from behind at 3x speeds while getting squeezed on the side of the road. You also don't have as much of a problem with cars pulling out to pass and hitting you head on because they didn't see you. I would rather crash on a motorcycle doing 100mph (I raced motorcycles for 3 years so I have done this) than to crash on a bicycle at 25mph because of the superior protective gear you can wear while riding a motorcycle. But then again, if you crash on a motorcycle you will slide much further and be more likely to hit something that will kill you (like a telephone pole or guard rail) I really don't which is more dangerous, I just feel more vulnerable on a bicycle than I do on a motorcycle.
If you tell her the stories...what do you expect???biknben
Sep 5, 2003 8:58 AM
Uhh...Don't tell her these stories about cyclist turned road kill and you'll be much better off.

I have come to terms with the fact that I can get seriously hurt or killed while riding. I do what I can to reduce the risks.

It's not much different than driving a car. There are huge horror stories but we continue to drive. We try to drive responsibly and wear a seatbelt.

Tell you wife about all the good stuff and leave out the bad. She'll be fine.
For every person I hear about who died cycling ...Humma Hah
Sep 5, 2003 9:00 AM
... all of whom are people I've never met, somewhere in a country of 300 million people, I personally have known someone who died of NOT cycling. That's someone who died in a car, or died of a cardiac problem due to excess weight and inactivity. My wife is well aware of my family's tendency to develop heart trouble, and is the one who signed me up for a gym a few years ago and wound up creating a fitness junky.

My wife does worry about my willingness to ride on busy streets and roads. My most recent compromise was to NOT commute down a particularly treacherous country road to the company's new location. She's right, while it is ridable, the danger is way past her comfort level and even I have to admit that routine travel on it is more likely to result in an accident than I'm used to. Occasional concessions like that convince her I still retain some sanity.
re: How do you keep the wife from worrying?Cary1
Sep 5, 2003 10:04 AM
1) Don't tell here the a-typical stories about people being killed.

2) Tell her where you are riding.

3) Buy a Road-ID so if you do get hurt, she can be contacted.

4) In my case remind her that the chances of something happening to me riding are far less than the nearly certain chance of me dieing at 55 if I don't. Have to love getting bad genes!!!!!
You can't...cmgauch
Sep 5, 2003 10:04 AM
wives worry.

You could get out for your road rides pretty early in the a.m. so you'd be done (or nearly so) by the time the cars came out.


Ride you mtn bike more often if that makes her rest easier.
I was one of those stories.....4bykn
Sep 5, 2003 1:37 PM
and I still ride. My wife worries every time I go out. SO if I'm going to be late I call. It wont stop the worrying, but it will keep it under control.
Buy Lots of Life Insurancebimini
Sep 5, 2003 2:31 PM
But a little more seriously,
Tell her where your going and when you will be back.

Carry a cell phone and call if you are going to be late.

Stay off busy / dangerous roads during rush hours. (people seem to do crazy things more so then).

Put a road ID on the bike with your home phone #, address, and her cell phone number on it.

Wear a helmet

Road cycling is a dangerous sport. I lost one close friend to a car several years ago and a fellow rider had his scull crushed by a truck this year during a road race I was in (he survived but it will be a long rehab period). I came very close to meeting my end on a bike 35 years ago. I still enjoy cycling but you must respect the danger. All three events were beyond the cyclists control.

Don't tell her it is risk free (nothing in this life is).

Do things to reduce the risks and let her know what you are doing to reduce the risks. Keep her informed.