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Forget diamonds! A girls best friend is(27 posts)

Forget diamonds! A girls best friend isrideslikeagirl
Jun 11, 2002 12:25 PM

Jeez! I can't believe it's taken me this long to try the stuff.

Got some freebies a while back and used it this weekend - like buttah, I tell you! Do they sell it by the gallon???

(I have friends that swear by Noxema - I think it'll be another couple years before I try THAT, tho. Just sounds weird. Seems like that mentholating action would get a little intense when you ride out of the saddle)
Chamois Butt'r save my bottom in Sunday's centuryTig
Jun 11, 2002 12:31 PM
The first 25 miles were super rough, causing everyone I knew to feel abnormal pain in the tush. I'm glad I used some extra Butt'r or else I'd have saddle sores on top of a tender backside. The stuff really works. Stay away from vasilene unless you like infections. That stuff is like a petre dish!
you should try bag balmcyclopathic
Jun 11, 2002 1:07 PM
that stuff lasts for some odd 300-400mi, good on nipples too ;)
so you are a girlishmael
Jun 11, 2002 12:40 PM
I thought that was a joke. Noxema hu? I'll do that. I've been using bag balm, it works well enough but it's kind of slimmy. Why spend a fortune on butter when you can use noxema, I imagine it'll make me pleasantly tingily like bitting into a york peppermint patty.
Noxzema might be like...Lone Gunman
Jun 11, 2002 5:00 PM
the Nalini creme that was being sold at Had menthol that made you tingle all under.
just used it for the first timeishmael
Jun 11, 2002 5:27 PM
Yes it tingles at first but after awhile the tingle disapears and the noxzema seems to turn into a wet spot. It goes on really easily and cleans off your hands easily too but I didnt notice much performance. Kind of disapointing but I'm going to give it a couple more chances. Another drawback is I think some crept up my urethrea, I came home and peed and I felt a burning sensation. I dont think I have a new venereal disease, it must have been the noxzema.
Yeow! And you're going back for more?rideslikeagirl
Jun 12, 2002 7:32 AM
What a sport!

But thanks for saving me from being the guinea pig- :)
Thanks for the test - what was your old VD? :) nmPdxMark
Jun 12, 2002 8:23 AM
I have also been using LubridermLone Gunman
Jun 12, 2002 8:30 AM
It seems to be fairly close to chamois butter, although this was not a scientific test showdown. I have tried virtually everything mentioned so far except Noxzema and Lubriderm is the closest to the real deal.
re: Body Glide works well for those who don't like greasy nmdzrider
Jun 11, 2002 12:43 PM
you betcha - technique...DougSloan
Jun 11, 2002 12:47 PM
Before a long ride, I slather that stuff on the chamois like icing on a cake. Really. It's oozing out the sides of the pad. I never regret it, though.

Here's a technique that works well. Turn your shorts entirely inside out. Apply Butt'r liberally. Then, holding the shorts still inside out, with the leg holes up, insert your legs into the shorts, still inside out. Pull the legs of the shorts up to mid thigh, STILL INSIDE OUT. The, when legs of the shorts are in place, pull the waist of the shorts up, turning shorts right side out in the process.

This nicely puts the Butt'r where it should go, without getting it all over your legs.

After doing this, I guarantee that is the moment you'll feel the need to take another no. 2, no matter how thoroughly you completely that task prior to putting on shorts.

LOL.....Len J
Jun 11, 2002 12:57 PM
I have the same experience. You think maybe it's good anti constipation medicine?

"Chamois Butt'r - the new laxative" nmrideslikeagirl
Jun 11, 2002 1:13 PM
prediction:JS Haiku Shop
Jun 11, 2002 1:12 PM
in nine to twelve months you're going to stop using "no. 2" and start phrasing it "potty", "poopie", "stinky", or "pee pee", "tinkle", or "tee tee". i can change an atomic-dirty diaper in my sleep, in record time, without any toxic leakage. looking forward to it? i figure if i change three diapers per day on weekdays and five diapers per day on weekends (considering daycare, and my wife also changing diapers), on average, i've changed 2790 diapers, so far. that is, if my math is correct. i can't give you a percentage on how many of those were like opening a gift from someone not very happy with you (guacamole that's about four years past its expiration). you'll never look at mexican food the same way.

but, it's still worth it.
TMI, Doug...T - M - I !!!rideslikeagirl
Jun 11, 2002 1:12 PM
Too Much Information, man! :)

But, I'm sure you're right-
Jun 11, 2002 1:17 PM
To someone who hasn't tried the stuff, that application description sounds really unappealing. I have a hard enough time getting my shorts on right side out at 6 AM.

Don't think I will try this stuff. As long as I don't know what I am missing, I should be OK. (How's that for logic!)
If it ain't broke.... nmrideslikeagirl
Jun 11, 2002 1:36 PM
just rub it on your taint then...ColnagoFE
Jun 11, 2002 2:47 PM
that's really where you need it. i dont bother with rubbing it into my chamois.
Jun 11, 2002 3:32 PM
I was wondering how many others did the inside-out shorts thing - it really does work best this way...

squish, squish... :-)

Doug, is that you in the photo caption contest? (nm)Psalm 147-10_11
Jun 12, 2002 7:23 AM
alter ego?DougSloan
Jun 12, 2002 7:28 AM
That could be my mountain biking, hippy tie dye wearing alter ego with hairy legs?

I try to be a bit more discreet.
Another believer in "the creme"!look271
Jun 11, 2002 1:02 PM
I use Assos-same difference, except it has more of a menthol aaaaaahhhhhhhh feel to it. Never leave home without it! Doug's technique sounds interesting-I'll have to give it a try.
Second the Assos. Started using it this yearJL
Jun 11, 2002 6:41 PM
and noticed a big difference. After the first time, (with the menthol) you barely notice it. For me, it doesn't take much of it to do the job. Just enough to make the shorts "stick".

Happy riding.

I really am new to this sport.fracisco
Jun 11, 2002 2:20 PM
Granted the longest rides I have been doing are about 45 miles, and I don't ride back to back days, but I haven't got 'monkeybutt' yet (what we call it in sailing when you are sitting around in wet shorts and your skin gets sore/irritated), just sore muscles from sitting on what probably isn't the best seat out there. I do wear lightweight capilene briefs or boxer briefs under my shorts, though, which might help prevent babboon butt.

What, I'm not supposed to wear anything under my bike shorts? Who makes these rules? First the tire labels and now this?!?
no rules, just experienceDougSloan
Jun 11, 2002 2:26 PM
No rules about what to wear, etc.

Go ride 100 miles or more, or long rides several days in a row, and you might encounter the need for lube.

The problem with underwear under your bike shorts is that it can wrinkle and chafe. That's bad. They are designed to be worn commando, and really do work well that way. Note that different shorts may work better or worse for particular individuals, pretty much like almost everything else in cycling.

No, there won't be an underwear check at the next group ride.

I like Dr. Naylor's Udder Butter (nm)ColnagoFE
Jun 11, 2002 2:44 PM
re: Forget diamonds! A girls best friend isBikeViking
Jun 11, 2002 3:09 PM
I too LOVE this stuff! I did a metric century this weekend and, while the tush was getting a little tender toward the end, no evidence of saddle sores whatsoever!! For one who is prone to "other" problems in that area from time to time (hemorrhoids), it's a REAL lifesaver!!