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ode to UPS--bring bike, fast! (haiku)(14 posts)

ode to UPS--bring bike, fast! (haiku)JS Haiku Shop
Apr 30, 2002 10:02 AM
six months, pennies saved
finally, the money have
went to bank for check

sent in mail payoff
awaiting delivery
merckx with full chorus

steel is real? must be!
even though it's not here yet,
less road vibration

is it such a jump...
105 to chorus 10?
civic to beemer?

just imagining
boxed columbus brain sitting
in a portland hub

oh, that large brown box
carried by small hairy man
in a big brown truck

bring it on, mister!
I can hardly wait, you see,
for shiny new bike

I, online shopping
purchased cages, pedals, and
strawberry Mity

awaiting, they are
for steel bike on which to sit
will be happy home

will i ride in rain?
of course, and thanks for asking
but not on the merckx!

but you have others--
you can only ride one bike,
single pair of legs?

one for winter train;
one for hilly centuries...
one for rain and wet!

one for panniers,
and then the merckx for the rest--
it's my sunday best!

don't forget the one
used for dirt and mud and such
(but that doesn't count.)

how many more days?
could have driven there by now
picked it up myself

bad mouth: bad karma
don't trash talk ol' UPS
or deliver Maine

here i am in south
bypass other rural routes
bring straight to dixie!

please, mister brown shorts--
drive your van with wing-ed wheels
bring me Ti seatpost!...

and regal saddle,
and the open pro wheelset,
and hand-painted lugs

skip the office park
they don't need supplies today
leave them on the truck

skip the golf pro shop
enough sticks, balls already
yes, give them the shaft!

skip the old ladies
they don't need home shopping buys
wait another day

but bring me the merckx
i'm pining for it, brown friend
i'm in the worst way!

arrive soon, should it
and when out of box i take
happy will i be

then, if knee agree
on steel merckx you will find me
drafting large brown truck
Bravo! Some of your finest work ever!Shad
Apr 30, 2002 10:19 AM
Enjoy the bike!
JS adds a new dimension to waiting for a new bike. A+++ nm.Mike P
Apr 30, 2002 11:02 AM
inspired, huh? nmDougSloan
Apr 30, 2002 11:29 AM
im welling up moved me..bravo...i can relate.ishmael
Apr 30, 2002 11:31 AM
my ups guy knows me ive gotten so much crap..there is a ups team i think and they dont ride in the brown..they have to!!
re: ode to UPS--bring bike, fast! (haiku)robbz27
Apr 30, 2002 11:32 AM
Wow. That brought a tear to my eye.

There is poetry...then there's the haiku. 'nuff said.
re: ode to UPS--bring bike, fast! (haiku)t-bill
Apr 30, 2002 12:32 PM
Truly a classic
I think I'll print and hang it
We all know your pain
Sorry, UPS just went out on strike! It'll be a few months...nmMB1
Apr 30, 2002 12:44 PM
"mister brown shorts" A classic!theBreeze
Apr 30, 2002 3:03 PM
That one is going in the permanent collection.
haiku d'etat - my soon the be brethren... what family!! NmSpirito
Apr 30, 2002 3:12 PM
the big brown truckzooog
Apr 30, 2002 3:42 PM
Don't we all love that big brown truck. Full of goodies . Sounds like an awesome bike.
Isn't an epic haiku a contradiction in terms?Me Dot Org
Apr 30, 2002 4:13 PM
if you can't finish
in seventeen syllables
it ain't a haiku
Such cruel torture! What exquisite anguish!Ahimsa
Apr 30, 2002 4:48 PM
To have sought far and wide.
To have seen it and fallen in love.
To have yearned and lusted.
To have saved and scrimped.
To have paid and been promised.
To have stroked it's finish in my fevered mind again and again.
And to have waited.
And waited.
And waited.

Hours? What?!?
Days? What days?
Business days?
It is none of your business!
I am not running a business!
I am merely waiting.
I am in the business of waiting.
And waiting.
And waiting.

I cannot stand it! I have been patient!
Why has it not arrived?
Where is the knock on the door? The shadow in the front window? The barking dog and me squinting through the peephole?
This is killing me! The suspense. The desire. The lust. The wait!
The wait.
The wait.
The wait.
Ah, the terrible wait!

Weeks now it stretches! Months on end!
Days and days upon days and days; they stand in tight formation like dominoes ready to be tipped.
Endless strings of days like fishermen's lines dissapearing into the murky sea.

Infinty! Forever! Never!
Oh the wait!

But wait! I only just remembered!

I placed the order....uhmmm.....yesterday.


A. (Very bad poet.)
"Mister Brown Shorts" = Santa Claus...NMbiknben
May 1, 2002 4:46 AM