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I've learned(16 posts)

I've learnedTed
Apr 9, 2002 6:36 AM
I learned something new last night. Never ever close your eyes when riding your bike on rollers. Actually closing them was fine. I managed for about 20 seconds. Then I opened them. Big mistake.

So what have you learned?

I've learntRideLots
Apr 9, 2002 6:44 AM
I've learned:

*Never hit things in the road that blow out your front tire while taking a drink of water (broken collar bone)

*Never change front and rear gears at exactly the same time (trashed rear derailleur)

*Never ride with a disc wheel when your pump head won't fit in the little hole for the valve (cell phone home after flat)

*Never eat too much fiber before a 155 mile event (1 hour in porto potty, ride home)

*Never keep your gloves on while completing visit to above mentioned porto potty (doesn't need further explanation)

*Never drink 12 cans of Ensure Plus on a very long ride (dehydration and puking)

*Never measure and then cut your steer tube (mark it instead)

*Never overlap wheels
Good life lessons, learned the hard way...floatch
Apr 9, 2002 7:03 AM
I've learned that you should always make sure your cleats are tightly attached to your shoes BEFORE clipping in. I've also learned that if your friend does this on the first day of Ragbrai, it's wise to take pictures of him standing in a puddle in his socks, struggling to pull his one shoe off the pedal.
I've learned to hop over snakes and dead things on the road, rather than running over them and risking foul explosions from built up gas in their distended bellies.
I've learned it's unwise to ride really tiny clipless pedals when you're wearing birkenstock sandals, even if you are just in the driveway.
I've learned to always, always, ALWAYS take at least a dollar on a ride so you can buy something to eat and call for a ride if you need one.
I've learned to never pour mountain dew into a waterbottle and then ride with it. Sugary, carbonated drinks do not fare well in shaking airtight bottles. They tend to explode at the most inopportune moments.
I've learned it's unendingly funny to put tequila or vodka in your buddies' bottles when they're not looking.
I've also learned how funny it is to pull a rider's shorts down over the back of their seat, because when they panic and stand up, their shorts go down nearly to their knees. This is especially funny on a group ride.
I've learned that my riding buddies are especially wary of riding with me when I'm giggling. I wonder why?
Good life lessons, learned the hard way...vitusdude
Apr 9, 2002 9:08 AM
Hey! You snuck this one in from the other thread. Here's mine:

Always pee every chance you get on group rides, but never pee against the wall in back of the country store if a religious fanatic who also happens to be real big and grouchy sees you.
Never change front and rear gears at exactly the same timeLen J
Apr 9, 2002 7:09 AM
Trashed Der? How did this happen, I do this all the time with no problem

More info please.


BTW. LOL on the gloves in the porta pottie, what a visual image I got.
I learnedSteveO
Apr 9, 2002 7:26 AM
when riding those same rollers, in the garage, at night, with the door open, to manually turn the lightswitch on. Otherwise, 10 minutes later when the auto-light goes out, you'll see the same result.
re: I've learnedRay Sachs
Apr 9, 2002 7:36 AM
Never try riding rollers no-handed until you've already done it sucessfully 8-10 times. Bit of a catch-22 I know, but it works for me. I ride everywhere else no handed without problem but the first and only time I tried it on rollers, I crashed harder than I ever have out in the world.

re: I've learnedLen J
Apr 9, 2002 7:45 AM
1.) Never (Suspend attention &) assume your torque wrench is working properly. (Result was stripped star nut (What a PIA)).

2.) Never change a flat in a salt marsh with (Agressive) greenhead flys hovering. If someone had a video, it would have seemed like I was spasticly dancing as I changed the tire (While I was being eaten alive).

3.) Never assume that that hard pull you are doing is welcome. (Especially when you look back after several minutes & find out you are alone).

more stuff I learnedRideLots
Apr 9, 2002 8:40 AM
*There's always a faster rider

*Be patient with your training

*There is a difference between training and masochism

*Helmet gud - save brains

*Long distance riding is more about nutrition and pacing than training

*Less weight on body = faster up hills

*I'll never ride like L.A., no matter how much I train

*I'll never ride like L.A., no matter what I buy

*Racing is very, very hard

*You can probably ride much further than you think you can

*Ride with someone faster for hard workouts; ride alone for easy workouts

*Assume all drivers don't see you

*Do you maintenance at home, not on the road

*Most people think we are idiots

*Chamois Butt'r

*An expensive bike won't make you much faster

*An expensive bike might shame you into riding harder or more, though

*Don't get mad at idiot drivers; it does no good

*You earn respect on the road by being respectful

*Too little training is better than too much

*Posting here is not as much fun as riding
re: I've learnedSlipstream
Apr 9, 2002 9:24 AM
First, great replies you guys!

I've learned not to crack any jokes whenever the boss' blood sugar level is low during a ride.

I've learned that staying too long in the john with a current copy of the CC catalog arouses suspicion.

I've learned that it helps to know first aid, particularly when manning a sag stop at a century.

I've learned that bad things happen when you least expect it and that you to keep a cool head.

I've learned that most riders are really nice, once you put them in their place.

I've learned that it is a waste of time to worry about what other riders think about you.

I've learned that a cold beer after a long hot ride is the second best thing there is.
I've learnedmr_spin
Apr 9, 2002 9:39 AM

  • When faced with a no-win situation, keep doing what you are doing. Don't panic and it usually works out.
  • If I want to ride alone, I ride alone. If I choose to ride with friends, I stay with them, even when they are going too slow.
  • Riding in rain is much more fun on a mountain bike than a road bike.
  • Riding at altitude is not the big deal everyone says it is.
  • Sunscreen is just as important as water on a hot day.
  • No matter how clearly you write a post in any Internet forum, someone will always misinterpret it badly.
I've learnedTrux
Apr 9, 2002 10:03 AM
Never pass on the right, especially if the guy in front of you is chewing tobacco.
things i've learned (haiku)JS Haiku Shop
Apr 9, 2002 10:15 AM
if cannot unclip
must try unclip other foot
or keep pedaling

check cleat screws' tightness
before each ride: shake method
listen for rattle

drink plenty water
oh no, not just while riding
hydrate every day

wash shorts every ride
don't sit around in wet drawers
or funk down under

saddle to fit arse
shorts to fit arse and saddle
butt'r if so choose

socks that fit will wick
shoes that fit won't make toes numb
fashion matters not

jersey loose no good
stuff in pockets pull on neck
strangle riding fool

jersey tight prefer
pockets stuffed without drawback
including tire tools

camelbak a must
carry stuff and water too
yes, i'm neurotic.

inclement riding
heat, cold, rain, wind, ice, snow, dark
improves character

inclement riding
shoes full of rain and soaked gloves
changes one's outlook

testosterone ride
group drop-fest, the strongest ones
the most surprising:

when true suffering
these are the ones most likely
ride 12 miles per hour...

while one struggles on
just to get cranks 'round enough
to get back to car

i've learned this much, too:
when doctor says "spin easy"
don't hammer instead :-(

carry extra food
especially, long group ride
someone else may need

carry extra tube
if two f**ts you do not have
one someone else might

carry a cell phone
for use in emergency

if off bike for time
change eating habits to match
or buy larger shorts

six beers then ride, fine
six-plus beers then ride, not fine
ride into parked car...

fall into the street
lucky only three AM
did i break my wrist?...

no, it's only sore
so keep riding next four weeks
left hand on the bars

oh, speaking of beer...
shaving legs much easier
in tub with import

speaking of leg shave
fancy razor do not use
pink daisy for me!

...and more of leg shave...
mister bubble, grape flavor
aloe barbasol

love elite cages!
twenty four dollars at shop
sixteen internet

bike fit important
otherwise limp like j-ku
miss season of rides

this knee killing me
though fix is some time off bike
stretching, ice, and rest

patient i am not
but learn patience, have no choice
hard to ride easy...

other thing i learned
shiny bike does not make fast
money not factor

bike mere vehicle
use for body, and for mind
but mostly for soul
Love the haikus! Here's some...floatch
Apr 9, 2002 11:14 AM
My bike calls to me
She is a patient mistress
It's me who can't wait

It's black and shiny
likes to go very quickly
makes my heart murmur

Can't hear my drivetrain
Heart pounding in my ears hard
Oops, just puked on stem

On long ride, tire out
Go home with nasty sunburn
I will ride again

Used to shave my legs
Got funny looks at food store
Now I ride hairy
LOL: 'Oops, just puked on stem'. (nm)JS Haiku Shop
Apr 9, 2002 11:43 AM
There is always someone who is doing more than you.MB1
Apr 9, 2002 2:24 PM
And that it doesn't matter.

I've learned that my wife can kick my behind on a bike.
I've learned that is only about having fun.
I've learned that are a lot of valid views that don't always agree with mine.
Miles don't matter-kilos don't either.
Take the time to enjoy every day.
A bad ride is not necessarly a bad thing.
There is no such thing as a bad bike.
Don't get upset and don't take it or make it personal.
Gears are overated, brakes are not.
It is possible to avoid having most flats.
All good things should have an end.