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Who wants to help make a cycling movie?(33 posts)

Who wants to help make a cycling movie?amerigooner
Mar 29, 2002 11:41 PM
I am an aspiring filmmaker and a cyclist so I thought why not combine the two. It would be fun to make and fun to watch. I was going to start brainstorming ideas, but then I thought why not ask everyone here for help. Get everyone involved. We could all contribute some ideas and then I could write it all out. Maybe a few others could help. Once that's done I'll take care of the rest, shooting and editing.

It will cost about $2000, but I don't really care. I just love making movies. So, anyone interested?
I'm game...sodade
Mar 30, 2002 4:05 AM
First thing you need is some bounding parameters:

1. length of film
2. aspect of cycling (i.e. touring, city rat, road race, MTB, etc...)
3. thematic goal of film
4. Setting
5. Characters

I am sure that there is more, but I have to go motivate myself to go for a 3hr training ride in the rain...
sorry.. i'm already writting one. nmcolker
Mar 30, 2002 4:57 AM
hope someone proofs after your "writting" it :o) NMIAmtnbikr
Mar 30, 2002 1:16 PM
p(r)oof yourself -can't even spell 'i am mountain biker' (nm)Spirito di Finocchio
Mar 30, 2002 2:21 PM
LOL ! IA as in the abbreviation for Iowa :oPIAmtnbikr
Mar 31, 2002 7:00 AM
There's mountains in IA?speedisgood
Mar 31, 2002 9:00 AM
Oh wait, I'm thinking of Illinois. Sorry.
LOL ! Maybe not "real" ones, but..IAmtnbikr
Mar 31, 2002 3:50 PM
the NE corner of the state is quite, well, ok, hilly? If you like some fairly technical mtb'ing, there are some good trails at Sugarbottom Recreation Area near Iowa City. I still have scars from there......As for Illinois, there are some nice areas to mtb there actually, one being Palos in the Chicago area. There are quite a few forest preserves scattered among the suburbs west of Chicago that have some nice trails. Also, the ride along the Fox River is a nice road ride, some nice areas near Geneva, and one bizarre bike shop run by a guy there as well. Full of old motorcycle and bike stuff, and you can hardly walk in it. Or for the Wisconsin/Illinois area, there is the Kettle Moraine area for mtb'ing. Some nice trails there as well. About the only thing real tall maybe is the ski area downhilling runs in Dubuque.'s already taken care.colker
Mar 30, 2002 2:31 PM
writing is creation... spelling is then corrected by assistents, secretaries. need a job?
no, I wish I had more free time this spring with...IAmtnbikr
Mar 31, 2002 7:04 AM
my job in Iowa the winter weather has been quite mild, so RV sales are skyrocketing. I am the service administrator at an RV dealership, so I had no winter lull in the action. The upside- it is not too often I can ride in January!
Who should we volunteer?Slipstream
Mar 30, 2002 9:33 AM
I think this is a great idea.

Spirito, without question and probably a lead role
also, Ahisma, if nothing else he can be your su chef (er asst director)
Woof the dog by all means and Haiku too
Elefantino would look real pretty in his pink and new Serotta
You can count on GRZY for a cameo appearance and a couple of zingers

We need a leading lady too, maybe the LoneFrontRanger

Maybe you could have a bar scene where there is a flaming war. In walks Spirito...oh yeah, I forgot, this is your movie. Sorry.

How about some other suggestions from those out there? Who would you volunteer, what role and why? This could be fun!
My ideas....TypeOne
Mar 30, 2002 10:31 AM
Let's see--we could have a small-town kid who enters a local race against the local college kids. Or maybe a kid enters a big race with his bigger brother, a former pro cyclist. But the older brother is dying and this news and the race brings the fractured family together.

Seriously, if it has not already been done, a good documentary about bike messengers might be interesting. Follow a group of hardcore messengers for a few weeks, on and off the bike. Good luck getting anyone daring enough to follow these maniacs through traffic with a boom mike. I look forward to hearing about your progress!
Bike messenger ideaamerigooner
Mar 30, 2002 11:56 AM
That's a great idea. I'll look into it
Read "The Immortal Class" by Travis Hugh Culley (nm)JBurton
Mar 30, 2002 12:25 PM
Yes, an interesting bookTypeOne
Mar 30, 2002 8:42 PM
Thanks, I have read that book, which is what made me think a story like it might transfer well to the screen. Of course it could also bomb if it is scripted and cast with "90210" actors.

It was strange how the author was willing to wield his U-bolt as a weapon, yet would make sure to pass a mother and stroller on the mother's side so as not to alarm the mother! Great parts about the unofficial messenger crits, critical mass rallies and daily encounters with motorists. I recommend this book to any cyclist and have loaned my copy to friends.
Here's an ideaamflyer
Mar 30, 2002 12:08 PM
It could be a peloton musical. Lance armstrong would of course be played by Bradd Pitt, and I think that Jan Ullrich would be well represented by Tom Hanks.

With a little makeup and a shaved head, Gary Coleman could make a comeback as the venerable yet fiesty Marco Pantani.

Can you imagine Armstrong's character and Pantani's character singing Bohemian Rhapsody (Armstrong:I'm-an-American, no-body-loves-me! Pantani: He's-an-American, from-a-Texas-fam-i-ly!" on their way up Ventoux?

Pee-Wee Herman would make great comic relief as Richard Virenque. And of course Cipo would be best portrayed by Steven Seagal, as they both have similar personas.

It could be huge. Think about it.
Get the girl from Colorado Cyclist to be the leading lady.Attila the Hun
Mar 30, 2002 12:26 PM
Yellow Jerseygregdogg62
Mar 30, 2002 1:43 PM
Wasn't there talk at on time of doing a movie version of the book "Yellow Jersey"? I think they even had a big time actor signed to play the lead role, maybe Robert DeNeiro. I could be making that last part up.
didn't dustin hoffman buy the rights?colker
Mar 30, 2002 2:43 PM
anyway, schmoozing things out with tour de france businness honchos will be tough. how many millions should we imagine here?
lonefrontranger = CENTRAL character -make it a chick filmSpirito di Finocchio
Mar 30, 2002 2:14 PM
harlett, jtolleson, spinchick are front rangers riding buddies and leads. give a couple of hours and im sure there will be some natural rivalry and edginess as i dont beleive their sisterliness and unity.

ahimsa, slipstream (the jolly lot) should play lesser, shallow sexy supporting roles and love interests. we need a bit of good old fashioned raunchiness and these 2 himbos are up for it. we gotta aim for nc17 and if we get an r rating then we have done ok.

bob roll and rae dawn chong are front rangers ma & pa, abusive, self-centered and dysfunctional but what an interesting and obvious choice for a cycling prodigy.

when elefantino is back and riding again we should use him as the stuntaman as he knows a thing or two about pain and already has a high threshold for it.

grzy is the production co-ordinator - as he'll argue against anyone and will never give up. he was in the armed forces and is and engineer so we can trust him to bring it on time and on budget. no words spared.

gregg can be the clapper loader as he has an innate ability to get out of the way when any action happens.

js haiku (d'etat) will be in charge of dubbing and subtitles for foreign audiences as his words may be understood in another language - he speaks in tongues already.

tjeanloz and kerry irons have to be the editors and and also in charge of continuity - they are the the men to cover up for our mistakes and make sure all technical details are thought out. they can build wheels that last 2 trillion miles without a true - surely they'll make a film out of our cobbled talents.

colker - writer (men of seemingly few words always have the most to say)

nigel - music man, he has distinctive taste and knows when the collaborative needs to be disregarded as they quibble over nothing.

doug - casting, we all kiss his ass anyway

let's take a risk and be controversial by actually casting rusty mcnasty as the bad guy. just to throw the audience. he needs a different direction to always being the obvious bnice guy.

wrenchscience supply all the bikes as chosen by woof. we keep them afterwards as punishment for their sins and disregard for advertising restraint.

eugene is the caterer coz if he feeds us some of the shrooms he is on then its sure to be somewhere between greenaway and tarkovsky in visual saturation and impact. he will also be doing all the equipment, and trailer hauling by carting everything on a push trolley so he can singlehandedly save a total of 2 trees, 4 rabbits and 6 pigeons. he is also going to be in charge of recycling the porta loo refuse to make bio-degradeable bullbars.

scottfree, lone gunman and me dot org are the teamsters. retro grouches as they are im sure whatever we agree on they'll tisk and shake their heads because they are natural trend buckers and will tell us how they could have made 47 films and 32 mini series on our budget and still get higher ratings with their simple, good old fashioned story telling. they also dont care about fitting in.

me ill be the film critic - if its good ill dismiss it as commercially driven pulp for bike psychophants who would consider losing a testicle if it helped their average speed (aka lance). if its bad - ill herald it as visionary and profound and more deserving of a european sensibility given its metaphoric and revolutionary vision of humans driven to pedal in circles fast. I ALWAYS TRY TO PAINT THE OPPOSITE and stir the intentions of others with abandon. i am the directors worst nightmare. ;-)

sorry, i cant be in the film as i promised never to again suffer false hopes of humiliation of waiting for a big break into stardom long ago - besides i cant even get a part in my hair these days let alone in a film.
that last line is classic noir dialogue.colker
Mar 30, 2002 2:38 PM
i could write the script around that line.
it almost wasnt the last line....Spirito di Finocchio
Mar 30, 2002 2:45 PM
but morrison just plain disappeared - poof! into thin air, just like that - after promising to write in the footnotes and a disclaimer.

shower scenes! and i want odorama!colker
Mar 30, 2002 2:53 PM
yeah, i'm a sick f*ck..
Mar 30, 2002 3:01 PM
"i know your name i know your game
sweet mary jane you're quite insane"

...the ramones
i want to watch this movie!spirito, great idea:chick movie!colker
Mar 30, 2002 3:17 PM
this kid is a talent!
mass appeal - it just makes sense.Spirito di Finocchio
Mar 30, 2002 3:27 PM
women cyclists get little mention and would praise it as fair play and about time..

non women cyclists will watch it as it heralds women and is not confining them to regular stereotypes.

men cyclists will watch it coz it has bikes

men will watch it as it has chicks bent over in tight clothes.

what little audience doesnt watch it will coz everyone else has.

but someone's got to write tons of dialoguecolker
Mar 30, 2002 6:39 PM
cause women need to talk!
You guys are so money and you don't even know it . . .speedisgood
Mar 30, 2002 8:46 PM
A cycling buddy of mine teaches art/film class in a local high school. He's doing a documentary of the bike racing scene in NE Ohio, gonna do interviews at races, live action shots from fixed positions and from the riders' perspective, he even mentioned bullet-time shots! Whoa.

If you race around Cleveland, look for the dude with the camera--and then do something funny for the camera. Maybe you'll be famous!
Mar 30, 2002 11:21 PM
one of the most interesting bicycle short films i've ever seen was "when bees attack" done by high school students(for under $400) attending the cal state summer school for the arts-- it was shown at the annual bfbc bike film festival in berkeley-- the bfbc festival is every february and shows a wide selection of independent bicycle related films, shorts, documentaries and animation-- anyone living in the area should look into it--
if any of you 'actually' do make a movie it would be a receptive friendly festival to submit it to--
the current film fest coordinator is shane rhodes--
Mar 31, 2002 8:58 AM
I'm forwarding your suggestion to my friend . . . maybe he'll take me to Berkeley next Feb.
You'd think Robin Williams would be onto this...TypeOne
Mar 30, 2002 8:56 PM
Isn't Robin Williams a big cycling and LA fan? I recall that he rode in the USPS team car at a TdF not long ago.
Williams apparently has the ability to push anything on a studio--look at Hook, Patch Adams, and other annoying feel-good flicks. Heck, I forgot half of them already. Get Robin Williams in the cast and some studio will bite.

Maybe Williams can play the part of Johan Bruyneel as the loveable, wisecracking team director who bucks authority and breaks the rules, bonds with his estranged child, deals with a tragedy like cancer, convinces a young & attractive woman to fall in love with him, and rallies a cycling team to victory in the Tour de France. Lance Armstrong, played by whats-his-name from "Time Machine," will play a minor role.
Many other creative liberties need to be taken to turn Lance's story into a Hollywood Robin Williams mushfest.
Mar 30, 2002 9:14 PM
If you want to do it right, it'll cost more than 2000 dollars. You'll need a camera with XLR microphone inputs so you can use a radio mic. Lavaliers on the principle characters will pick up conversations in the moving shots much easier than a boom mic.

You'll need to light the interiors, like the back of the bike shop and the bedroom scenes.


Breathtaking scenery.

At least two or three surprises the principle characters must overcome.

Struggling against impossible odds: dysfunctional relationships, sickness or injury, love, hate, with cycling as metaphor.

Hero and heroine find each other, bond, fall in love, after going through extraordinary experiences together on their bikes. This could be comic, tragic, dramatic, serious, or all woven together in a complex plot.

Prurient interest: glistening, smooth shaven legs, rippling quads in rapid, fluid, rhythmic action, daring feats of physical prowess and skill, mastery of form.

CPB has been soliciting proposals for documentaries on the general subject of ethnic diversity, lifestyles, like say, Puerto Rican bike couriers in Manhattan, or workers who ride together and race on weekends. They're possible for funding or distribution.

I too, carry a secret passion to make movies, ever since seeing Vittoria DeSica's The Bicycle Thief at the Thalia Theater on upper Broadway back in the Sixties. For the first time in history, it is now possible for anyone to go out with a little camcorder and shoot a story, and put it together on a home computer. "The movies" is poised to become a folk art, like painting, writing and music have been in the past. Where's the product?
I wanna play the bad guy!Leisure
Mar 31, 2002 2:31 AM
Bad guys are always more fun.