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A funny thing happen on my Sunday ride...(34 posts)

A funny thing happen on my Sunday ride...Geof
Feb 12, 2002 9:34 PM
On my way home I saw a group of riders who had been resting and turning around on a semi restricted road. They were about .25 miles up and I had a good cruising speed going (about 20-21mph). At first, I thought I would speed up and play catch-the-paceline but decided to stick to my pace. On the next hill the group broke up and I caught them reformed, on the top of the hill. A bit back I realized the entire group was comprised of females. About 12 or so. I though it would be rude to join in on the group so I decided to pass. In doing so, I said "hi, now who could pass up a draft off this group..." My god, by the looks I got I may as well have said "Hey, ya all wanna f!@#?". I proceeded down the hill on my merry way, but was really suprised at the attitudes (looks) I was shot when I came up on them... Is this a typical roady woman response to a TOTALLY innocent, jovial remark? Or, was this group taking itself WAY too seriously???
Some guys have all the luck!guido
Feb 12, 2002 10:28 PM
Who were these ladies, prepping for the Olympics? On the other hand, you might have hung with them a few minutes, and maybe found out. I wouldn't consider it rude. After all you're on the same road, going in the same direction, doing the same thing. By the time they re-grouped on top of the last hill, maybe they were breathlessly trying to recover and embarrassed by your friendly intrusion.

Miss Manners might suggest that your remark made them self-conscious, drawing attention to their sex. Next time you see them, comment on the weather.
re: A funny thing happen on my Sunday ride...Starliner
Feb 12, 2002 11:08 PM
Could have been any number of things.....

- they might not have noticed you coming up from behind and your appearance may have startled many of them

- they may have thought it weird seeing you passing them while interpreting your statement as if you intended to join them

- they were a group of paranoid, man-hating b!tches whose party you just crashed

I would give them the benefit of the doubt and go with the first reason. They may have been deep in group thought/talk and oblivious to the world behind them. By what you explained, I think you have nothing to feel guilty about or to lose any sleep over. Let it pass, and just remember to tinkle your bell the next time you approach such a group from their backside.
re: A funny thing happen on my Sunday ride...Avanti Guy
Feb 13, 2002 3:31 AM
The only rule about chatting to female cyclists you dont know is something your mother may have told you, "look but dont toutch" :)...
try turning it around...koala
Feb 13, 2002 3:34 AM
How many women would have said what you did as they approached 12 guys? They probably perceived your comment in a sexist, drooling way. If you had stuck to cycling(nice bike) or something that did not highlight your maleness they may have talked to you and you may have found new friends.
precisely (nm)morrison
Feb 13, 2002 6:42 AM
koala makes a good point....RayBan
Feb 13, 2002 6:55 AM
regardless of how COOL it is for a guy to ride up on a group of women cyclists, you can't vocalize it that way. Don't forget that whole men are from Mars, Women are from Venus thing....
come on now....g-money
Feb 13, 2002 7:55 AM
I paraphrased a bit... I did make comment about the day... good ride etc. And with a big toothy grin a simple comment that was actually meant to be a POSITIVE comment recognizing that a group of women only were out together, was made. Have we become so super sensitive that a compliment cannot be construed as such??? Please...
maybe you weren't the first that dayTig
Feb 13, 2002 8:45 AM
Maybe just 10 minutes before you came upon this group, someone else said something rude to them. Maybe a cyclist, or more likely a few teen guys hanging out the window of a passing car. Who knows! Then again, they could have been nazi carpet-munchers with an attitude!

Thanks to the over use of unneeded politically correctness, the world expects more restrictions of us. What you said to them doesn't sound tasteless, but my oh my, it wasn't "PC"! Anyone remember the kindergarten boy who was charged for sexual harassment after kissing a girl at school?
Feb 13, 2002 8:52 AM
I believe it was Kristen who once said in a thread that women like to be chased. If that's the case, then women should expect such mildly overt comments to come from a man from time to time, and not get offended by them as long as no boundaries are crossed, which is what seems to be the case here.

If the female riders chose to perceive the comment in a sexist, drooling way, then that's too bad and is their problem. This sounds like a time where the guy shouldn't allow his maleness to be supressed by feminist accusations of sexism.
re: A funny thing happen on my Sunday ride...Mikebikr
Feb 13, 2002 5:13 AM
Your response would have been better if you smacked one of them on the ass as you rode by;)
hahaha! nm :)raboboy
Feb 13, 2002 6:59 AM
Absolutely!!!!!! nmg-money
Feb 13, 2002 7:57 AM
Women react differently to commentshms
Feb 13, 2002 6:32 AM
In my limited experience, women generally are more sensitive/concerned about comments from strangers on the road than men are. For example, although I do not like it, I do not become upset when passing drivers yell unpleasant things at me. One of my wife's friends, who rides frequently, becomes unglued when she is showered with similar comments. Although your comment was innocuous, I would interpret theresponse as an example of the different way that men and women generally react.
try a better line next timetheBreeze
Feb 13, 2002 7:00 AM
Maybe the reason for the looks is that your line was just so LAME. Jeez, we KNOW we're female, but don't need it pointed out, all the time. ("Gee look at that, she can ride." "Yeh, better than you derf!")
You may have meant it as a compliment, but take koala's advice. Next time talk about bikes, the weather, "where ya' from? " etc.
Now on MY Sunday ride, a guy asked if I rode pro. A nice compliment, but I had to laugh.
as a stranger to them, be more conservativeTig
Feb 13, 2002 7:17 AM
No matter what intent you had, it was taken the wrong way. I'd guess it was because they didn't know you at all and felt uncomfortable with the line. Keep it simple and friendly. Something like, "Good morning. This is a wonderful day to be riding, huh?" Women tend to respond better to general warmth and friendliness that doesn't appear to have any hidden motives.
Remeber, it's only sexual harrassment............JS
Feb 13, 2002 7:51 AM
if the women don't find you attractive.
Remeber, it's only sexual harrassment............Sintesi
Feb 13, 2002 8:51 AM
Yeah Geof, maybe your appearance was what was so offensive.
I know, I know....g-money
Feb 13, 2002 8:59 AM
What woman would perceive a sweaty, heaving mass of maleness attractive... HE HE :-)

My wife likes it...

Actually, it was about 20 freakin degrees out and the only visible part of any of our bods was the face... Maybe the cold had something to do with it...

Maybe they were mad cuz I cought them with out even trying... (just kidding, don't want to offend) LOL :-)
re: A funny thing happen on my Sunday ride...Ken
Feb 13, 2002 8:37 AM
They probably weren't in heat yet so were unreceptive to your "sexual overture." Better luck next time.

re: A funny thing happen on my Sunday ride...scruffyduncan
Feb 13, 2002 9:05 AM
I don't want to come over all PC on you, but imagine if an openly homosexual rider came up behind you and made a similar comment. You might find it funny, you might get mad.

Also a stronger rider breezing past making some throw-away comment while you struggle, red-faced, up a hill, is never going to endear himself.

Still, you should never take yourself too seriously, they could have at least laghed at you.
openly homosexual???secourir
Feb 13, 2002 11:52 AM
doesnt the rest of the non-cycling world deep down inside view us all as openly homosexual anyway?

c'mon, next time your at a set of lights beside a pick-up with gun racks driven by a bearded wife beater wearing stereotype looking at you by glancing sideways blow him a kiss and youll see how he has just been waiting to throw a non majority sexual comment your way. especially if he has his lady beside him. i suggest not doing the above unless you are both a good bike handler and sprinter.

but is a fun way to spice up a ride.

this of course is not applicable for lance of course as even though he has only one it is a real man's one and cannot be viewed with associations otherwise implied.

just playing ;-)

stiff wristed lycra boy
Point made... but...geof
Feb 13, 2002 12:24 PM
We had completely cleared the hill and were on sort of a plateu sp?. As far as a my reaction to a homosexual... You assume the comment was made in a sexist sort of way. It was not off hand at all IMNSHO... However, the suprise may have been an issue... Who know's, it was just funny...
Clearly lesbians. nmIt's obvious
Feb 13, 2002 9:04 AM
You are a homophobic jerk.DAC
Feb 14, 2002 4:17 AM
And Geof is clearly a misoginist. Get your heads out of your @sses, guys!
Ooh-ooh pick me-I'm a homophobic misoginist jerk too!Crankist
Feb 14, 2002 6:02 AM
Lighten up, humorless Nazi-type.
And your simply clueless, living in an unrealistic world....g-money
Feb 14, 2002 6:59 AM
You might want to pull YOUR head out and lighten up a bit. Therapy might be a good idea at this time. Do you know the definition of light-hearted HUMOR?? Obviously not. Take your overly offended self and ride in the group I was talking about, maybe you'll have something in common...

It's all about the bike right????

Pardon me... It's you're-not 'your'...geof
Feb 14, 2002 10:56 AM
I certainly wouldn't want to be a woman hating.. gramatically incorrect... homophobe...
re: A funny thing happen on my Sunday ride...xx
Feb 13, 2002 9:04 AM
Geof - TRY THIS NEXT TIME - As an ice breaker and a way to add a little joking comradery in group rides in the old days, we use to pull the shorts (non-bibs of course) of a rider down and put them around the saddle. The amount of laughter that typically ensued was great.
Maybe it's just that you are UGLY! (nm)bb
Feb 13, 2002 9:06 AM
dont know about you guys but i rarely pass womensecourir
Feb 13, 2002 10:58 AM
on my rides i pass almost all the guys as they are not really moving. but the women although less seen... they can spin!!!! for whatever reason i dont see that many slow girls and i am always impressed at their efforts.

but rarely will they so much as flick a hand , utter a hi or even look which is cool by me ... but a little boring.. i hope its cause they are focused not because we have different expectations or that it has become a competative thing between sexes.

i dont really see the original posters comment as that bad but more as wit or humor which sometimes falls the wrong way. timing is everything and a good taunt can be just that or maybe its just that women in sport have adopted the bad sides of bravado and aggressiveness which i thought were supposed to be our traits. this we can do without.

in all, i have respect for anyone who rides whether good or bad. whether fred or purist if they are on two wheels moving under their own power then to me they are family and share a similar passion and love.
dont know about you guys but i rarely pass women,Homer J.
Feb 13, 2002 1:02 PM
dont know about you guys but i rarely pass women, I always hang on their wheels looking at their butts.

Hmmmmm, butts.
dont know about you guys but i rarely pass womentheBreeze
Feb 13, 2002 1:17 PM
'i ' "but rarely will they so much as flick a hand , utter a hi or even look which is cool by me ... but a little boring."

Figure it out, half the guys posting on this topic would probably take it as a come-on. Who needs that when you're out trying to get in a good workout? Personally, I wave- like it when someone waves back. If they want to tag along for a while, that's fine too.
dont know about you guys but i rarely pass wometheBreeze
Feb 13, 2002 1:20 PM
i "but rarely will they so much as flick a hand , utter a hi or even look which is cool by me ... but a little boring."

Figure it out; half the guys posting on this topic would probably take it as a come-on. Who needs that when you're out trying to get in a good workout? Personally I wave, like it when someone waves back. If they want to tag along for a while, that's fine too.