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okay, okay, already!'s board, haiku format...(6 posts)

okay, okay, already!'s board, haiku format...Spiritual Haiku
Sep 21, 2001 11:33 AM
where to find helmet
head shaped like sports equipment
advice: full body cast

twenty miles, feet sore
haiku master with advice:
don't run in look cleats

humma gets new job
door closed: does fridge light stay on?
now, try it on mars.

should i wax or not?
skip, read humma's post again
single speed fusion

do you judge by bike?
no sir, i ride bike by judge
lives at end of street

do you judge by ride?
or does judge ride bike to work?
robe caught in his spokes!

after a rain ride
what is best to put on bike?
butt for 'nother ride.

buying overseas?
and response says "buy human"
but...i wanted BIKE

tour of spain stage twelve
sounds like sports bar talk to me
board should meet for beer!

first ride, first rain ride
shoulders, feet, ankles hurting?
advice: P B R

know you're old when you...
doctor says drink ensure plus
(and stay off the bike)

things make you go hmmm
more reason: board meet for beer
how about memphis?

need high tech sports bra
response: homer in sports bra
I like to say "bra"

bra post: girls strike back
with no talk of testicles,
jocks, willies, shaving

velocity post
or some type of physics stuff
speed chump to grzy

non-engineer truth:
eat, drink more, descend faster
downhill behind car

non-engineer truth:
stop all sags to drink, don't pee
toilet? hill bottom.

who makes lightest frame?
another recurring post
shows up every month

hello? haiku guy?
get off your arse and spew 'ku
board ripe for picking!

spiritual 'ku
moping since nine eleven
'ku been difficult

now back with passion
imagine retribution
mindful of victims

poll: heavy down fast?
depends on what type heavy
and if chin on stem

sidi shoe advice
get loan, eat ramen noodles
sidi expensive!

the cyclist pre-nup
doesn't work for jeffreyh
I wed before rode

the cyclist pre-nup
null and void if sleep dog house
and i don't mean do(u)g.

seatpost is slipping
the most obvious answer
top it with a seat

spinchick kissing-up
she butters bread on both sides
i'm falling for it!

discourage spinchick
please no more MB1 kilt
have trouble sleeping!

understand bad day
yes, it is a cycling board...
AND community

the odd non-bike post
can be endured, time to time

moser, good or bad?
depends on self confidence
it sounds like "poseur"!

how to protect cleats?
two years back i walked four miles
look cleats, small scratches

flying with bikes now?...
why not ride your bike instead?
hawaii? add pontoons.

ti worthless, you fools!
handle equals "Flame Bait Maker"
'nother waste of time.

does Do(u)g have real job?
yes, he works for RBR!
hired to stir the board.

told you all way back
about do(u)g's alter ego
read the next haiku

doug sloan teenage girl
crush on backstreet boy "howie"
pink bike, basket, bell

spiritual 'ku
The 150 this weekend
double metric next

then i turn to food
macadamia cookies
and pabst blue ribbon
Your kilt is in the mail, or is your male in the kilt? nmMB1
Sep 21, 2001 11:41 AM
Spinchick not easily discouraged and does notSpinchick
Sep 21, 2001 11:44 AM
butter bread (too much cholesterol!).
hai-kurate response to post with all that physics stuffSpiritual Haiku
Sep 21, 2001 12:05 PM
At steady state, all forces must balance.

Fpbr= force of cheap beer= (m*b)/(total calories and temporal proximity of last meal)

Fw= resisting force of wife who prefers yardwork over indulgence in cheap beer resistance, proportional to likelihood of being assigned to "dog house"

Fs= normal force in state of non-intoxication (sobriety)

- Balance forces in x direction:
(1) Fw*cos(theta) = Fs*sin(theta)

- Balance forces in y direction:
(2) Fpbr = Fw*sin(theta) + Fs*cos(theta)

From eq. (2), if Fpbr increases (more cheap beer) either Fw(ife), Fs(obriety),
or both must increase to maintain balanced forces in the y direction.

From eq. (1), if Fs(obriety) increases, Fw(ife) must increase to maintain balanced forces in the x direction.

Therefore, if Fpbr increases, Fw(ife) must increase to maintain balanced forces.

For a given body, the value of Fw(ife) can only be increased by an increase in the blood alcohol level.

Therefore, at steady state, <6 cans of Pabst Blue Ribbon increase propinquity of wife, >6 increase propinquity of dog house, all other things being equal.
thank you. I needed a fix.Dog
Sep 21, 2001 1:12 PM
You are amazingly gifted. Not only artful with the words, but perceptive, too (except for the teenage girl thing).

Jeffrey, You are amazing. Thanks (nm)Len J
Sep 22, 2001 4:25 PM