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have you ever biked butt naked?(9 posts)

have you ever biked butt naked?Breck
May 18, 2001 9:57 AM
or had the urge to. not in public but on remote desert highways or remote jeep trails on the mtb. don't think me weird. a little eccentric mebee and the locals would agree. we local "athletes" formed the bgcc -bubble gum cigar club to simply respond to those don't run, bike, hike, or the like. we don't take ourselves seriously thoug road dog did the '99 iron man, campy man was a brit national bike racer, george a nationally ranked 10k runner, rick the old man has been to everest but not on top, dave pie man has mtb'd in morocco, a mercury cycling team guy, a russian elite gal marathoner, a few others sim to spirits, and and me an all around wannabe.

back in 1995 at near 53 yrs. did the desert remote runs accessed by the 4wd truck. three hours in the borrego desert runs with the new zealand full split shorts, nb trail shoes, no socks & with a la running pack carrying two 28oz bike water botts & one 70oz nalgene water flask, and nothing else. after close to three hours in the heat & only buzz tails(rattlers) & the occasional park ranger(summer is off season in the desert) would get these weird primitive urges to go native as my mind began to float. but never did.

on my "off days" would desert mountain bike 5 hrs in the heat of the day (from 1 to 3pm) in the remote oriflamme canyon area of borrego state park. no rangers, no nothing cept an occasional buzz tail or rosy boa (absolutely beaut harmless snake). it was here one day got the urge to mtb butt naked. so for mebee three miles did it but still a bit nervous coming acrost a pilgrum being on the trail for less reason than me. just you and the bike
sans civilized leanings or leanings you may call them. never done it before but mentioned it once to road dog and he did not think it extremely odd but could not do it he said cept mebee remote desert island, etc. on the other days filled in road biking std issue togs and local park human inhabited trail running more conservatively attired.

So ....have you ever done anything sorta-weird or thought of it while spacing out on the bike? like just you and your machine out alone and the world recedes and you get the non-ingrained thoughts that only come around at those times.

cheers & back to the bike novel. am trying to make the novel bit diff but not too much at the edge or fringe of the galaxy but then who knows on a nother planet in the universe how bike riders would appear, look, act, think. what would their bikes be like? zero
drag mind propelled space warp seeking maybe. no boundaries or dimensions or
material mass to impede their perfect flow. a space-time continuum only limited by their thoughts. no air to breathe, no form to take. no collective imposed limits as we have. no gears to turn, and infinite progression flight with only their thoughts to determine the boundaries. what are thoughts? do you have any unbridled by what pin point in time you were born into.

"Have you ever gazed on grandeur where's there's nothing else to gaze on, Set pieces and drop-curtain scenes galore, Big mountains heaved to heaven, which the blinding sunsets blazon, Black canyons where the rapids rip and roar? Have you ever swept the visioned valley with the green streak streaking through it, Searched the vastness for something you have lost? Have you strung your soul to silence? Then for God's sake go and do it; Hear the challange, learn the lesson, pay the cost." -Robert W. Service
"The Spell of the Yukon and other Verse"
Barse & Hopkins, 1907 edition

have you pilgrum?
How long were you out in the Sun? nmMisJG
May 18, 2001 10:41 AM
ehhhh, no...but(t)...Haiku d'état
May 18, 2001 12:05 PM
I do appreciate your literary references. you've turned me on to a couple good writers here in the last 2 weeks. i'm checking out service on the way home.


ps. i've made late-night beer runs in cutoffs and a t-shirt on my cruiser with blinking lights. had to remove the bottles and strap 'em to the rear rack. that's the most wild & wooly i get.
"bikers ale"Breck
May 18, 2001 1:04 PM
once late at night i got the urge,
to have a beer and why not splurge.
the car is parked the cops are out,
so take the cruiser for the stout.
why not said i and so i go,
cutoffs and tee shirts for the show,
got the bottles strapped to the rack,
wild and wooly on my way back.

nice! a smile to end a perfectly crappy week.Haiku d'état
May 18, 2001 2:17 PM

i'm still not going to ride around in my birthday suit, though!

one question: if you're riding around without any duds, where do you carry your pocket lint? wait, i'm not sure i want that answered.

ps: that sure would make for some interesting/painful/unforgiving road rash.
I don't know if this countsmr_spin
May 18, 2001 3:01 PM
Ride naked, no. Sounds a little rough on strategically placed body parts to me. But a few years ago, I was doing Amasa Back in Moab. Once you get to the top, there are trails that go all over the place. After exploring for a while, I was soaked with sweat, and with the wind and it being October, it was a little chilly. No one else was up there, so I found a secluded spot in the sun but out of the wind, stripped it all off and layed out for a while on some warm red rock why my stuff dried. It felt great. I highly recommend it. I've often felt like doing it again on some of my local trails, but there's too much poison oak!
I confessconfusion
May 18, 2001 4:01 PM
I have done it before also. On MTB around a sort loop trail (2mi?). A few of us did it just for something to do one day when we got tired of our race training routine.

I will tell you this...on a MTB you stay standing a lot except for a few flat smoother sections. I think we got spotted by a pair of ladies out walking on a trail that ran right along side the one we where on but from the giggle I don't think they cared.

I did worry a lot about slipping on this slick uphill and also didn't care to see they guys bum in front of me but other than that its not all bad.
YOU GUYS ARE GAY!oO=[stinky]=Oo
May 18, 2001 10:22 PM
Hey, Stinky,mike mcmahon
May 18, 2001 10:33 PM
your ex-girlfriend Megan (the Meganator) was here about a week ago looking for you. She said that you were over four months late on the child support payments and that you might lose your rights to see Stinky, Jr. if you don't get caught up, which may require you to go back to work at the Circle K. Megan thinks she may be able to get you your job back at the Circle K. However, the new job will entail a demotion. She also said your going to have to kiss some serious ass with Jerry, the assistant manager, if you want to have any chance. If you can't track Megan down at the trailer or the Circle K, you'll probably be able to find her at the bowling alley. However, try to arrive early; you know how she can be after her morning Bloody Marys. Godspeed, Stinky.